Red Herring
by Death by manga
Summary: Harley's had enough. And she's got a plan to get revenge. Will Batman be a pawn in her plan, or will he find her real motive before it's too late?
1. Chapter 1

p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"It was raining. I got that from Nygma's clothes: soaking wet. The Bat's cape was still dry. Must keep a heating unit on at dries it out. Pretty smart. Might run into Freiz or that ol' electrocutioner. Don't want to be too cold or wet on a night like this./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"Nygma had a nasty black eye, must have told a particularly bad riddle this time around. Wondering just what led to his capture this time. Did he write down his address using the first letter of every line? Or did he simply post a negative of his location along with his riddle? I swear, the guy's been loosing his touch./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""Hey bats, nice catch you got there. How long did it take ya this time aroun'?"/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"Bats just ignored me and made his way. Bad call. "Puddin'"s been causing a lot of problems lately, and it getting too close to comfort./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""I've been trying to get your attention for the past month or two batsie. I mean really, what's a gal gotsa do ta gets some attention nowadays. Do I gotta give you a nuddie show? I hear Selina's out of town, touring paris. Can't say the same for Ivy. She's been awol for some time now."/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"Then for a brief pause to play the act of surprise. "Hey! Isn't that the same time around that Crane got out? I hear that was one of Mista J's break in's. It's a shame we've been on a break lately. He could have sprung me loose as well."/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"I saw those pretty little bat-ears perk at that. The great detective must have known about the relation to those break-ins into arkham, but he didn't have the know-how that I gots from being that Joke's lova./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""what do you know? Are Crane and the Joker working together?" Bats threw Nygma into the guards ahead of him, making his way back to my cell./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"My cell. This place use to be riddled with photographs and drawings I'd make of that joke. That stupid jerk. But now, it's been blank, because now my head isn't filled with thoughts of that idiot and how much I em style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"love/em him./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"My heads a lot clearer now, and I can think plenty about what I need to do./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""Where is he! What's he planning!" The bats was getting antsy. I could see the crows feet purking up through his cowl./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""Careful bats. Stay up too late and you'll fall asleep in the batmobile and take a dive. Or is it always in autopilot?"/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""I don't need this Harley, either tell me what you know or I'm walking."/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""Fine! First sessions are always free." I gave a playful smirk. Bats was always fun to play with. He was always more gentle than that Joke, and I could read him so much better. "Joker's been planning something for months. Why do you think Crane and Ivy are gone and haven't been active at all? They've been planning!"/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""What are they planning?" His hands were gripping the litte air holes to my cell. He must be getting desperate if he's that quick to start asking me for help./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""Think bats, give and take. I'll set you on the right path, but you'll need my help to catch them bat."/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"I stroked my index along his as it slipped through that little hole to my cell. He flicked me away and pulled himself up, turning away. My little performance was going great. Now I just needed to lay cherry on top./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;""Think Batsy! What does Ivy, Crane, and Mistah J's MO's all have in common? You got to think about why they would all be together and not me. What do Crane and Ivy offer that I can't?"/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"As he walked away, I gave a pretty loud giggle, proud of my performance as I kept the bat's going down the path I needed of him./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpLast" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p 


	2. Chapter 2

p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"Everything was red, eyes drifted down the walls like Houdini falling down Niagra Falls. A Hideous laughter perpetuated the room, echoing like the twisting, insanity of my life./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"He had to love me. He was just so angry because of that stupid bat. If I could just get rid of that terrible monster my Puddin would love me./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"He loves me so much./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"See? He killed the bat, He must be getting getting better now./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"What's wrong? Why is he hitting me? Is that gasoline? What is he doing to mr. Giggles? Is that Mr. Arkham? Why Puddin, what do you want from me?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"It Hurts Puddin!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;"The bat is back, it must have been because the bat wasn't actually dead./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Puddin knew the Bat wasn't dead, he must have been waiting for him to show up. He knows I love him. He must love me back. There goes that bullet, Mista J wins. We Won!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"What? Is that the cops?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Let's go Puddin!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Huh? Where's the car? Where's Puddin? Where's the Bat? Oh, there he is!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"WHY AREN"T YOU DEAD!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"DIE! DIE! DIE!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"It's Your fault! It's Your fault Mista J hurts me!/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"No Mista Arkham I don't want to talk to you. What's that sound? IS THAT MA PUDDIN?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Mista J and Harley are back together. It's just so wonderful./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Mista J said that once the Bat is dead we're going to go to Metropolis and visit the carnival. It'll be so magical! So what's you plan this time around Puddin? What're you going to carve up this time?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Huh? Why am I wearing your old clothes? I'm scared mista J. Everything is going red. I can see the blood everywhere. Is that mine? Is that yours? Is it the bat's? Tell me it's the bat's./p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"I'm scared Mista J. It's so dark. Where am I?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"What's that sound?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Mista J?/p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;" /p  
p class="MsoNoteLevel1CxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: none; tab-stops: .5in;"Maybe yer around this corner? /p 


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